SINGAPORE: A lot of us walk into work pretending we’ve got everything under control. We act unbothered by impossible deadlines, toxic coworkers, and bosses who keep piling on more work. But the second we’re alone, all the stress we’ve been holding in comes pouring out.

Recently, one Singaporean woman confessed in a Reddit post that she’s been “crying every day” yet feels like she has no choice but to stay because of the dismal job market. 

The situation, she said, has been making her feel “super miserable.”

Having spent five years in the workforce, including two years at her current company, the woman said she never intended to aggressively climb the corporate ladder. In fact, she had already told her bosses that she was “happy in my current role and not looking to get promoted.” 

Despite this, she said new responsibilities continue being added to her workload, often without proper guidance or support.

“I have no proper support. Timelines are compressed, responsibilities are piling up. It’s making me super miserable, and I have to OT just to meet expectations. With the lack of support and constant scrutiny for screwing up in these new areas, I want to call it quits.”

“As much as I want to learn, it’s miserable to learn in such a manner. Is it wrong to just want the status quo for a year at least?” she wondered.

“Thank God I don’t have a looming BTO to pay for, but it doesn’t help that I don’t know when I’ll be employed next or whether I’ll have to work in the same industry again.”

The woman added that her colleagues are struggling just as much. “Everyone on the team is busy…. We are all in this together. I am seriously burnt out and lost. How do you all get through such days, and is this really the kind of economy where we can prioritise mental health?” she asked.

“The mental workload and suffering aren’t worth it.”

Her post struck a chord with many online users, who jumped in with messages of support and shared their own experiences to remind her she’s not alone in feeling this way.

One commenter wrote, “Are you me? Because I’m going through the same. Cry before work, during work, and while on my meal breaks, then back to the grind. I’m trying to find another job before leaving, but the market is cold.”

Another said, “Just to let you know that you’re not the only one feeling this way. I’m struggling and overloaded, and sometimes my tears just flowed while working. I’ve been sending resumes and praying I can leave this job ASAP. I know it can be difficult, but cheer up, and I hope that we can escape from this [job] soon!”

Some commenters, meanwhile, urged her to consider quitting for the sake of her mental health.

One told her, “Quit. The mental workload and suffering aren’t worth it, and it’s a vicious cycle because this affects how you think and plan your career/life with calmness and clarity.”

Another added, “If you can, just quit; else go home on time every day and have something to look forward to, like cooking or gaming. Don’t bother with the OT, take care of your own health first.”

In other news, a man has found himself in an unexpected dispute after his ex-fiancée insisted he reimburse her S$15,000 in cash for the CPF downpayment she lost when their BTO application was cancelled.

Hoping to find some guidance, he posted on the r/asksg subreddit on Tuesday (Apr 28). 

In his post, he explained that he had been in a relationship with his ex-fiancée for five years before they called off their wedding plans. He also noted that he had already returned her share of the wedding banquet and vendor expenses.

Read more: Man says ex-fiancée demanded S$15k after BTO cancellation: ‘She wants the downpayment back’

This article (‘I cry every day’: Worker says burnout and lack of support are taking a toll) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: A 27-year-old Singaporean says he’s now willing to accept a salary between S$2,500 and S$3,000 just to “get something on his resume.” It’s not exactly the dream, but at this point, he just wants to start somewhere.

In a social media post, he shared that he graduated in 2023 and, somehow, is still without a full-time job today, unlike many of his peers who have already moved on and settled into their careers. Watching that happen from the sidelines has not been easy.

“I get jealous seeing my friends,” he admitted. “Is anyone else going through the same thing? Fellow Singaporeans, do you think the job market is pretty bad?”

He was quick to stress that he hasn’t been “picky.” In fact, he said he has been applying to “everything and anything related” to his field of study, casting his net as wide as possible. Unfortunately, nothing has stuck.

“I either get a call and then get ghosted, or I don’t hear back from the company at all,” he said. “I get one to four interviews every month, and it’s getting frustrating.”

Still, despite everything, he said he’s thankful to have some income coming in from helping with the family business and running a small home-based bakery on the side.

Expert says Gen Z applicants need better resumes

The state of the job market for Gen Z has been talked about loads online. Endless articles have been churned out, and there’s a steady stream of job seekers on local forums laying it all bare, admitting just how much the whole ordeal has messed with their mental health. 

At the same time, there’s been plenty of chatter about how younger people are quietly abandoning the traditional career path their parents swore by and drifting towards the gig economy instead.

Still, while some have more or less thrown their hands up and resigned themselves to never finding stable work, others are still stubbornly pushing on, CV in hand, hoping for the best.

Which then leaves the slightly exhausting question: how do you actually stand out in all this chaos?

Jeannie Kim, a former vice president of content at Policygenius, digital executive, and journalist, shared in a CNBC article that she’s reviewed over 1,000 resumes. Drawing from that experience, she offered a few practical bits of advice for job seekers trying to make theirs stand out:

Be specific

Instead of just listing tasks or responsibilities from internships, Kim says job seekers should go a step further and include actual results from their work, ideally with numbers.

She encourages them to talk about the “impact” they’ve had in the organisations they’ve worked in.

Tailor your resume

Kim advises job seekers to stop sending the same CV to every job and instead tailor it for each role. 

This means tweaking your resume so your skills and experience match what the job is actually looking for.

Be concise

Kim also says it’s important not to go overboard. Jobseekers, she explains, should focus on including only relevant information tied to the role and highlighting “their biggest achievement.”

Read also: ‘She wants me to pay for the whole house and lifestyle’: Man questions girlfriend’s intentions

This article (‘It’s getting frustrating’: Jobseeker says he’ll take S$2.5-S$3k pay just to ‘get something on his resume’) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: One employee’s patience finally ran out after years of being asked to handle “grey areas” or tasks that had absolutely nothing to do with their actual job scope.

Sharing their frustrations on the local forum called singaporejobs on Monday (May 27), the employee said their boss had constantly expected staff to “cover the grey areas, do more work outside their job scope, and think like a business owner.”

The employee admitted that they initially followed instructions without questioning them and carried out the extra responsibilities “fairly well.” However, they eventually became burnt out as their boss continued to criticise their performance despite their efforts.

According to the employee, their boss ranks staff on a scale of one to five.

“It’s like 1 for ‘cannot make it.’ 2 for ‘barely making it.’ 3 for ‘average.’ 4 for ‘better than average.’ 5 for ‘industry best.’”

During their first year, the boss allegedly told them they “were not good enough” and “dismissed their effort.”

In their second year, the boss reportedly said they “were still a 3.”

By the third year, the employee said they had finally reached their limit. “He told me I was still a 3 and asked me to do more work.”

“I just told him politely no. Since you already said there’s no promotion, then I am happy to do my work, and that’s good enough. Please don’t ask me to do more and cover grey areas and frame it as career development.”

“I think once bitten, twice shy. Unless the remuneration or incentive is made clear upfront, I am not going to do anything that is not within my field of work.”

Wondering if they did the right thing, they asked Singaporean users: “Am I the a***ole for telling my boss no?”

“Good job for standing up for yourself.”

Many commenters quickly sided with the employee, saying there was nothing wrong with setting boundaries at work. 

One user pointed out how absurd the demands were, writing, “Do outside job scope, think like a business owner, but you don’t pay me like a business owner; it’s like asking a horse to think and work like a cow.”

Another said, “You’re not the a***ole. Bosses and owners want to get two workers for the price of one.”

A third simply said, “Good job for standing up for yourself.”

Still, some warned the employee that refusing extra work could come with consequences during future performance reviews. 

One told them, “Just be prepared that your next performance grade might be a 2, or even 1 + a PIP. From what you have shared, it seems like your boss considers covering extra work a basic expectation. Hence, the average grade. That makes not covering that extra stuff a below-average grading.”

In other news, a Singaporean Threads user who tried to call out two national servicemen on the MRT has instead found himself at the centre of online criticism, after his post struck a nerve with many who felt the men were unfairly singled out.

In a post published on Tuesday (March 28), the user, who goes by the handle “chefphotodan,” shared a photo taken inside a crowded train carriage.

Read more: Man criticised online after calling out NSFs for using phones on MRT: ‘Cut our boys some slack, please’

This article (‘Am I wrong for saying no?’ — Employee tired of being asked to cover ‘grey areas’ at work) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: After struggling to land a full-time role, a man shared that he’s now juggling two gig jobs just to keep up with the rising cost of living in Singapore.

In a post on a local forum on Thursday (May 30), the man, who said he is in his early 30s, wrote that he has been doing GrabFood deliveries “to survive in this economy” since January 2026.

He added that he recently picked up a manual labour job that pays S$100 for an eight-hour shift, and didn’t think twice about taking it just to boost his income.

According to the man, his daily routine currently revolves around balancing both jobs. He explained that he handles GrabFood deliveries during the morning before heading to his second job in the afternoon. “[This second job is on] an ad hoc basis. I am scheduled whenever the company needs manpower.”

Despite the exhausting schedule, he said he still carves out time to apply for full-time roles daily, hoping something more stable eventually comes through.

The man went on to share that when he spoke to his family and friends about his situation, he told them that if he could at least earn S$4,000 from one job, then he wouldn’t need to hustle so hard and get an additional job “just to stay afloat in Singapore.”

Curious to know whether others felt the same way, he asked locals for their opinions:

“If you had a monthly salary of S$4k, would you still opt to do a side hustle (if any) to earn additional money?” 

“S$4k is enough to save/invest and pay for bills. It is doable.”

Although many commenters understood why he felt compelled to take on multiple jobs, several reminded him to be careful and not push himself too hard 

One commenter wrote, “I hope you get a job that pays at least S$4k soon! I admire your grit in doing 2 jobs. Take care always, and listen to your body, it’s the only one you have.”

Another said, “Take care of your body and don’t injure yourself during the second job. Make sure you have the right posture when lifting heavy items, or you will regret it when [you become] older.”

In response to his question about side hustles, many users said they personally would not continue taking on additional work if they were already earning S$4,000 a month from a single job.

One commented, “If I earned S$4k and it sufficiently covered all my needs (savings, insurance, bills, spending, etc.) and if I had my emergency savings, I wouldn’t do a side hustle.”

Another shared, “I bring home around S$2,100. Still go on holiday about twice a year. So S$4k is more than enough in my opinion. It depends on what you want to spend or save for.”

A third added, “If you are single with 0 commitments or any big expense upcoming, I think earning S$4k/month is enough to not take up a side hustle. Like what others have said, your body is your biggest money maker. S$4k is enough to save/invest and pay for bills. It is doable.”

In other news, a woman has come under fire online after describing her own boyfriend as “unromantic” for not surprising her with “just because” flowers.

In a post shared on the r/sgdatingscene subreddit on Saturday (Apr 25), she opened up about wanting more spontaneous and thoughtful gestures in her relationship.

Read more: ‘Is romance dead?’ Woman slammed after calling BF unromantic over ‘just-because’ flowers

This article (‘Just to survive’: Man juggles two gig jobs after struggling to find full-time work in Singapore) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: A 30-year-old woman who has been unemployed for six months said she has realised just how frustrating and draining joblessness can be.

In a post on a local forum, she wrote that while she still has enough savings to get by for now, the experience has been far more difficult than she expected. 

She said, “Technically, I have a sufficient buffer to tide me through for now. But I’m realising that the psychological erosion of unemployment—the growing sense of worthlessness—is something no amount of savings can prepare you for. I know by right we should not let our job or anything define us, but it is hard.”

She added that this is not her “first time between jobs,” but it is the first time she has struggled to recover emotionally and mentally. In previous transitions, she said she was able to secure roles quickly and even received better offers. 

“In the past, I was able to get back quickly…but this time feels different and dead silent. I thought I was the only one, but I see people around me—both junior and senior—all feeling the same pinch. It feels like the ground is shifting beneath us.”

The woman also shared that she feels caught in what she called a “Goldilocks loop” in the job market. 

She said she is often seen as “overqualified” for junior or mid-level roles, with employers possibly assuming she would be too costly to hire or not “flexible” enough compared to fresh graduates. 

At the same time, she feels underqualified for senior positions that “demand hyper-specialised experience.”

She added that even public service roles, which were once viewed as a stable option, have become much more competitive and difficult to enter. 

“This used to be the seemingly ‘safe’ path, but it has become incredibly demanding and difficult to enter. It’s no longer the ‘dinosaur era’ where a degree and a good attitude were enough,” she said. “I’ve even tried those government support things like career fairs, coaching, and training, and they’ve been proven useless.”

Out of desperation, she even considered entering the gig economy as a way to “stay active,” but eventually decided against it after running the numbers and realising the returns would not really make sense.

“I’ve looked into PHV or food delivery…but the math simply doesn’t work. Between high rental costs and petrol, you’re essentially working for the leasing company. With AI on the horizon, the future feels even more precarious.”

“I’m reaching out because I just want to hear from others who are in (or have been in) this same boat. How are you coping, and is there something I can do to solve this? I hope I’m not the only one feeling this way.”

Her background

Providing some context about her background, she added that she’s been in the workforce for almost a decade.

She explained that she grew up in a low-income household and did not have many advantages early in life.

“I didn’t have things handed to me,” she said. “This taught me to be financially savvy out of necessity. Halfway through my career, I completed a part-time degree while working full-time just to support myself and my parents.”

“Because of that background, I’ve saved and invested religiously. Even when my income grew over the years, I still kept my lifestyle humble—spending like an intern to build a safety net.”

“You’re not alone.”

The post struck a chord with many Singaporeans, prompting them to open up about their own struggles with unemployment and burnout.

One individual shared, “Same… my applications are now nothing but silence. I used to get callbacks from HR at least. It’s super quiet now as time has passed by. As much as I want to worry less, I really want to work. My skills gap would be widened even further at this rate.”

Another commented, “Same boat, older than you. Unemployed for much longer. Not worried about money yet, but yes, the situation is messing with my head a bit.”

A third added, “You’re not alone. Landed a job working for my dad after being unemployed for 8 months. Without him, I would probably be begging on the streets.”

Others said her description of being stuck in a “Goldilocks loop” felt painfully accurate. 

According to them, many mid-career workers now find themselves trapped in an awkward middle ground, seen as too experienced, too expensive, or too difficult to mould for junior roles, while still not meeting the expectations for senior-level positions.

One user wrote, “I get how you are feeling. I have been actively looking for more than a year, and the number of interviews I got I can count on one hand. A few years ago, even during Covid, I was still able to get interviews fairly easily.”

“Now, like you said, I also feel like I am too highly paid for junior roles and do not have enough experience for senior roles. I don’t know how people on my LinkedIn feed can so easily change roles in this market. Really tip my hat to them.”

In other news, concerns over “quiet firing,” or silent termination, are gaining traction among workers here, after one employee highlighted how ongoing restructuring in her company appears to be pushing staff to leave without formal layoffs.

In a post on the r/askSingapore subreddit, she shared that her organisation has been undergoing restructuring since the end of 2024.

Read more: Employee asks, ‘Is quiet firing/silent termination becoming common in Singapore?’

This article (‘The psychological erosion is real’: Singaporean unemployed for 6 months opens up about joblessness) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: A video capturing two young Malaysians saying they feel Singaporeans are more proud than Malaysians is making the rounds on local social media interest pages, forums and messaging groups online.

The video, which is entirely in Mandarin, is a street interview by the TikTok channel KayPohBros. In this video, the interview asks a couple, who are from Kuala Lumpur, about some of the differences between Singaporeans and Malaysians.

They were asked whether Singaporeans or Malaysians are more well-mannered, and the man answered, “Hard to say. I’m leaning towards Malaysia.”

They were also asked what the differences were between Singaporeans and Malaysians speaking Chinese. The woman replied that Singaporeans mix more English in when they speak Chinese.

When asked who is more proud, the duo agreed with a laugh, “Singapore.”

Interestingly, many Singaporeans reacting to the video online agreed. One commenter wrote, “Malaysians are indeed very friendly, you can chat with them very easily and have a good conversation.”

Others echoed similar sentiments, highlighting the warmth and openness they often experience when interacting with their neighbours across the Causeway.

Singaporeans and Malaysians share deep cultural, historical, and social ties, enjoying similarities in food preferences and language overlaps to humour, values, and everyday experiences shaped by a common past.

Cross-border movement has also strengthened these connections. Many Malaysians live and work in Singapore, while Singaporeans frequently travel to Malaysia for leisure, food, and family visits.

Some commenters noted that what may come across as “pride” among Singaporeans could also be interpreted as confidence shaped by the country’s rapid development, while Malaysians’ perceived friendliness may stem from a more laid-back social culture. Rather than being opposing traits, these qualities often complement each other in cross-border friendships and collaborations.

Ultimately, the video has sparked not just comparisons but also reflection on how closely intertwined the two societies remain. While lighthearted differences in behaviour, speech, or attitude may exist, many online agree that Singaporeans and Malaysians have far more in common than what sets them apart.

This article (Young Malaysians say Singaporeans are more ‘proud’ in viral street interview) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: A social media post where a Singaporean woman thanked Singapore Airlines for the kindness the carrier extended during one of the hardest times any person can experience, the death of a parent, has gone viral.

Audrey Yap, who goes by @yourlobangsis on Instagram, wrote in her caption, “I will not forget this experience with Singapore Airlines. I don’t take this lightly, and I am happy to tell the world about it.”

Ms Yap explained that her mum died unexpectedly during a holiday in Vietnam in February. However, she had booked a trip to Shanghai 10 months in advance with her mum on a first-class Singapore Airlines Suite, scheduled for June of this year.

What SIA did for her was twofold. First, what Ms Yap appreciated was the hassle-free refund process the airline facilitated for her during her “time of overwhelming grief.”

“This was done easily via their call centre and email exchanges,” she wrote.

However, after the refund was processed, because some of the miles in her mum’s SIA account had expired, not all of the miles could be returned.

Ms Yap then submitted an additional request for the reinstatement of these miles. She added that she understood the country did not need to do so, but was thankful SIA did.

Now the amount the miles are worth, S$113, isn’t a lot when compared with the amount Ms Yap will pay for all the flying she’ll do in her lifetime. But how SIA treated her is causing her to continue to choose to fly with SIA, even if it’s more costly.

“For this alone, I’m so proud to be a Singaporean, and I love my national carrier, Singapore Airlines, which carries compassion and heart in its policies.

For S$113, you won a loyal customer because in the lowest moment of my life, in my time of need, you were willing to make an exception.

People over policy.

Now, take my money, Singapore Airlines,” she wrote.

Commenters on Instagram and Threads, aside from expressing condolences, were heartened to read her story, with some saying they had the same experience.

“I had 7 tickets booked in 2 separate bookings, my kids and I, and in another one, my parents. Unfortunately, before the holiday, I found out I had cancer and had to start chemo asap. Informed SQ and was expecting to only be refunded for mine, but SQ refunded for all 7 tickets in a week. All they asked for was a memo from my doctor. Truly the best airline,” wrote a Threads user.

“I had a similar experience of their compassion when my friend and I had to cancel our flight (booked with no free cancellation), however, due to my friend’s health crisis, they refunded her the full amount plus miles deducted. I also feel even if it is expensive, I’ll try to always take SIA if I can,” added a commenter on IG.

“I redeemed my flight, and my house caught fire 1 week-ish prior to my travel. I called them, and they changed it immediately to another day with no questions asked,” wrote another.

“Last year, after my short visit to PH for my cousin’s funeral, I flew with SQ. And I really do appreciate their staff who kept on looking out for me because I was crying so hard during the whole flight. The silent crying. The staff kept on asking if I needed something. They are really good and very compassionate. Kudos to SQ!” a woman wrote on Threads. 

The Independent Singapore has reached out to Ms Yap for further comments or updates. /TISG

Read also: Vietnamese woman whose brother died thanked SIA staff for ‘humanity, kindness, and professionalism’

This article (‘Take my money’: Woman praises Singapore Airlines for compassion after losing her mother) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: A frustrated jobseeker is questioning whether some companies are abusing the hiring process by getting applicants to do what feels like “free work” through lengthy interview assignments, only to ghost them afterwards.

In a post on the r/askSingapore forum, the individual asked fellow Singaporeans how they can tell if a company is genuinely hiring or simply making candidates do unpaid work under the guise of a job application.

“How do I tell early on if a company is simply asking their candidates to do free work for them or if they are really serious in hiring?” the jobseeker wrote.

According to the post, they have gone through “many encounters” where companies handed out pre-interview assignments that allegedly took as long as a week to complete.

The jobseeker said they poured huge amounts of “time and effort” into the tasks just to meet the expected standards. In some cases, they were even invited for interviews afterwards, where hiring managers discussed the submitted work in detail.

However, despite making it through those stages, the outcome was often the same.

“They always ghosted or rejected me later on,” the individual shared. “There was even once when the hiring manager told me that they changed their hiring criteria to require a PhD for the job position after I had already submitted all my assignments.”

Fed up with the repeated experiences, the jobseeker said, “I don’t want to waste my time to do free work for such companies only to get ghosted later on.”

“Send a nice, polite email to them…”

In the comments, one Singaporean user said it was highly unlikely that the companies were trying to take advantage of the jobseeker.

“Unless your work is in creative media design (like actual artwork), no one really needs you to do free work,” they wrote. “Yes, case studies are strenuous, but people drafting a marketing campaign or operations strategy or growth strategy is pretty much like 0.0001% of the real work. Campaigns, strategy, and operations are tied to execution; anything like plans can really honestly be generated by ChatGPT 99% of the time.”

Others, however, argued that if the assignments take more than one day to complete, it could potentially be considered unpaid work.

One user wrote, “If the assignment can be done by a fresh grad in a day, it’s just a test. Anything more? Then yes, it’s free work.”

Another commenter advised the jobseeker to verify whether the company had used any of their ideas by checking the company’s website or ongoing projects.

They added, “If your assignment materially contributed to their business function or is similar to what an employee does, you’re working without being paid. That’s unjust enrichment.”

“Send a nice, polite email to them saying you did xxx work for them, and you believe they didn’t follow up on it and that the work contributed to their business. Request $X for the number of hours spent. If they ghost you, write a second letter of demand. Say if they don’t pay up, you’ll go to MOM.”

In other news, a Singaporean mum shared on Reddit that she felt stunned and overwhelmed after her mother-in-law interfered with how she disciplines her child.

In a post on the r/asksg subreddit, the woman said she and her mother-in-law had argued a few weeks ago because her mother-in-law disagreed with her approach of “shouting” or lightly “tapping her son’s hand” when he misbehaved.

Read more: Woman claims mother-in-law used S$10k debt to dictate how she disciplines her son

This article (‘Some assignments take a week’ — Jobseeker asks if companies are exploiting applicants for free work) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: The idea that men should foot the bill on a first date is still pretty much the default, but one 29-year-old Singaporean woman thinks it’s time to change that.

Posting on the r/sgdatingscene forum, she shared that she has a personal rule when it comes to first meetups. She never lets her date pay for everything.

“I never let my dates pay everything on the first date,” she wrote, before explaining why the whole expectation feels off to her. She asked people to think about it this way: if a guy goes on three first dates in a week, covering all those bills would ‘be insane.’ “I have a brother, so I can kind of feel for men. I wouldn’t want him paying for all of his first dates,” she added.

For her, the fairest setup is simple. Go halves at the start. “My stance is that on a first date, it’s a 50/50 split. THEN if there’s a romantic connection and you guys decide to continue going on more dates, the guy can offer to pay (not every date, lah, of course),” she explained.

She also pushed back on the idea that a man paying on the first date proves he is a “provider.” In her view, first dates are often more about putting on a good show than revealing who someone really is. 

“First dates are low-key performative,” she said, adding that she has seen men who are struggling financially still insist on paying just to “secure a second date.”

“I know a lot of girls would be like, ‘But I want a provider, yada yada.’ Hmm, someone could pay on the first date but not be a provider. I wouldn’t use the first date to gauge whether or not he’s a provider.”

She also pointed out that some so-called ‘compromises’ are not as fair as they sound. “Some people might argue that on first dates, the guy can pay for dinner and the girl can pay for dessert/a movie. But hor… This is also quite unfair because dinner is usually 3-5x the cost of the dessert/movie.”

“I also support 50/50.”

Her post struck a chord with many in the comments.

One male commenter said he finds it “ridiculous” to pay for someone he has just met, especially when there is no guarantee of a connection.

“Unfortunately, many females (or at least the ones that I went on dates with) often expect the guy to pay but refuse to play their part during the date. I do not mind paying, provided they make the date fun, choose a place that is not too expensive, and do not give the entitled attitude,” he added.

Another user said they actually feel more comfortable splitting the bill on a first date.

“I completely agree with your takes, and I personally feel more comfortable when we split the bill on the first date!! My take on that is we’re both still getting to know each other, so I don’t have the expectation for you to fully pay!”

A female commenter also backed the 50/50 approach, saying it does not make sense for one person to shoulder everything. 

“I also support 50/50… Like, it’s not right for y’all to pay for everything on dates. And we don’t need to go to some high-end restaurant. I am too Singaporean and used to local food from a young age. I just want chicken rice.. I am sure there are a lot of girls like me.”

Still, not everyone agreed.

Some argued that whoever initiates the date should be the one to pay. One user explained, “As a male…if I’m the one who asked the girl out, I will cover 100%, just because I’m the one who initiated. Fair mah. Subsequently, assuming the 2nd date, 3rd date, 4th date happens and no massive confession yet, then it’s 50/50.”

Another commenter pointed out, “I don’t expect anything, but the reality is that if I met two guys, one paid and one didn’t, I would have a better impression of the first one. First dates are just kind of one of the first avenues for you to score brownie points. Like girls would also always wear full makeup/be the prettiest on first dates.” 

“I don’t think guys MUST pay, but it depends on how much the guy wants the girl. He can choose to split, but he must also accept the reality that the girl may meet another guy who paid and choose that guy instead.”

In other news, a woman who has been married for 20 years confessed on social media that her husband has “never contributed financially to the household” and instead spends his money on pets such as “hamster cages, parrots, fish, and dogs.”

In an anonymous post on the NUSWhispers Facebook page, she said she married him “for love” and truly believed they “would build a life together.” Over time, however, she found herself carrying all the financial responsibilities on her own.

Read more: Singapore mum of three says she paid for the family for 20 years while husband spent on pets

This article (Singaporean woman says first dates should be 50/50, not paid by men) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

MANILA: A framework agreement on petroleum security is being pushed forward by the Association of Southeast Asian Nations (ASEAN), as the region struggles to scramble for adequate fuel supplies amid the oil crisis brought about by the conflict in the Middle East.

“APSA, or the Asean Petroleum Security Agreement, is being pursued to enable coordinated emergency fuel sharing and collective responses to supply disruption,” a Reuters report quoted the Philippines’ Trade Secretary Cristina Roque as saying on Thursday (April 30).

The Philippines is chairing ASEAN this year, hosting the 48th Leaders’ Summit on May 7 to 8.

The conflict, which began on Feb 28 when the United States and Israel started bombing Iran, resulted in the effective closure of the Strait of Hormuz, a chokepoint for 20% of the global energy supply. This has sent oil prices skyrocketing, and countries in Southeast Asia, heavily dependent on oil from the Middle East, have been among the most badly affected.

The Philippines, which relies on 98% of its oil from the region, declared a national emergency less than three weeks after the war started. Indonesia, Malaysia, Thailand, and Vietnam have also been affected by the Hormuz closure.

These countries have begun to look for other sources of oil, including Russia.

Underlining the vulnerability of the region, the United Nations Development Programme (UNDP) warned last month that the war may end up costing countries in the Asia-Pacific billions of dollars in losses. Moreover, nearly nine million people could also fall into poverty as a result of the war.

What APSA is for

According to the Philippines’ Trade Secretary, moving forward with ratifying the pact is meant to increase energy resilience and fuel sharing across Southeast Asia, and added that the country will make implementing a region-wide power grid for the purpose of energy sharing a priority.

ASEAN will also maintain open and predictable trade and steer clear of trade measures that are restrictive, which include bans on the export of essential goods during uncertain times.

Ms Roque added that the current trade agreement, including the free trade agreement with South Korea and China, will be strengthened and accelerated by ASEAN. Furthermore, food security and supply chain coordination will also be strengthened by the bloc, which would secure better access to food region-wide.

The energy supply for essential services during critical times, such as health care, hospitals, emergency systems and critical care facilities, will also be safeguarded by ASEAN member states. Also, support for micro, small, and medium enterprises will be intensified by ASEAN through better access to financing, which will help safeguard jobs during times of economic shock. /TISG 

Read also: Netizens call out top EU diplomat for asking Southeast Asia not to ‌buy Russian oil amid Iran war

This article (Energy pact pursued by ASEAN amid fuel crisis due to Iran War) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: Senior Minister Lee Hsien Loong’s wife, Ho Ching, is courting controversy on social media once again with a barely disguised analogy about the criticism over Singapore Airlines’ (SIA) Muslim meals.

Earlier this week, SIA confirmed that its Muslim meals are not Halal certified after a netizen asked whether Halal and non-Halal fare are reheated in the same ovens.

SIA clarified that while its Muslim meals are prepared using ingredients sourced from Halal-certified suppliers, the meals do not have Halal certification as they are reheated alongside other dishes in shared ovens and are served with the same servicewear that non-Halal dishes are served with.

The revelation sparked backlash online, with some asserting that they cannot believe the national carrier would serve non-Halal certified meals to Muslim passengers.

Amid the controversy, the Islamic Religious Council of Singapore (MUIS) noted in a statement that food labelled “not halal-certified” does not necessarily mean it is non-halal and encouraged passengers to check with airlines directly if they have concerns. The council suggested that Muslims could bring their own food on board SIA flights as an alternative if needed.

As the issue continued to draw strong reactions, Mdm Ho decided to publish the following story on her personal Facebook page: “SIA doesn’t serve char kway teow on board its flights. A wealthy tycoon, dressed simply, would buy and bring along his favourite char kway teow in a simple plastic bag to board his flight.

“He would look very much like any uncle in the neighbourhood hawker centre, at ease and at peace with the world, carrying his own favourite food. He then enjoyed the luxury of having his very own favourite char kway teow on board his favourite airline.”

She added, “No entitlement. No demands. Just a simple man making do for himself, buying his own food to bring along to enjoy. Ahhhhhh ….The luxury of life and living.”

The post attracted a flurry of comments, with some asking whether she was urging concerned individuals to stop making demands about SIA’s Muslim meals and just “make do” for themselves by bringing their own food on board the plane.

Others asked whether it was wise for her to add fuel to the fire with such a “poorly disguised” analogy given the unease the controversy has caused.

Interestingly, ex-ruling party politician Amrin Amin recently weighed in on the SIA meals issue and said that he disagrees with those labelling concerned individuals as “entitled”. He said, “For many, this comes from sincere religious conviction, not from a desire to make demands.”

Calling for a more constructive tone, Mr Amrin said the conversation should continue “calmly and respectfully”, with recognition of good-faith efforts on all sides while allowing space for differing perspectives.

Mdm Ho shared Mr Amrin’s post but her own Char Kway Teow story remains up on her wall.

Some commenters said they were not surprised by Mdm Ho’s decision to post the questionable story as she had explained back in a 2020 Facebook post that she “was born a maverick – coming feet first instead of head first,” and that “irreverence is in her blood.”

This article (Ho Ching under fire for char kway teow story amid SIA Muslim meals debate) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.

SINGAPORE: A man in his 20s recently shared that his strict parents, who take 15% of his salary every month, expect him to buy a home by the time he turns 35.

In a post on the r/asksg subreddit on Sunday (Apr 26), he shared his fears, saying he does not have enough money to fulfil his parents’ wishes.

“I don’t have enough money to buy a house at 35,” he said. “I feel like my life is screwed. I’m already prepared to sleep on the streets at night.”

He then elaborated on the main reasons he has been unable to build up savings.

He recalled that when he was younger, his parents never allowed him to develop financial independence. When he needed food, he said they would “buy the food for him” instead of “giving him pocket money.”

During his polytechnic years, his parents forbade him from taking on any part-time work, limiting his ability to earn or manage his own finances. “I literally had $0 in my bank account until I started my first full-time job.”  

At age 20, after graduating from polytechnic, he said his parents pushed him straight into full-time work, as, according to him, “they didn’t want him to go to university.”

Even after he started working, he said control over his finances remained largely in their hands. His salary was deposited into a bank account managed by his parents.

“My parents have full control over the bank account where my salary goes. I also have the password and stuff, so I can log in to see the balance, but every month, my parents will log in and transfer 15% of my salary to their own bank account.”

He added that because his parents were strict about spending and limited his social life when he was younger, he later found himself overspending on experiences and items he had missed out on, such as going to Halloween Horror Nights and buying things he had previously been denied.

At 22, he said his parents pressured him to resign from his job. “The worst thing is, there were people at work who cared about me, but I was dealing with too many family issues. I didn’t have the capacity to tell people at work that I was being pressured, and I wanted to stay.”

He has remained unemployed since then. 

Despite this, he said his parents continue to stress that he needs to buy his own home by 35, something he now feels is increasingly out of reach.

“Stop giving them access for a start.”

His post drew concern from other Singaporean Redditors, many of whom urged him to take steps toward financial independence.

One commenter suggested opening a new bank account at a different bank and arranging for his salary to be credited there instead. “Just have HR transfer the money to the new account. Then, once you have enough, please further your education. A private uni or whatever niche courses are ok,” they wrote.

“Lastly, and I say this with a lot of concern, please have a good therapist. It must be stifling and traumatic growing up with these people.”

Another advised him to leave home as soon as he is able to. “Yes, you are screwed. You are their backup plan for their retirement age, not their child. I don’t know how old you are right now, but you need to walk away from them. As a legal adult, nobody can force you to do what you don’t want to do unless you let them.”

A third user criticised his parents, writing, “Them transferring money into their own account is absolutely disgusting and not normal. Stop giving them access for a start. I know the job market sucks now. But do continue trying to get a job and don’t give up. Time to start being an adult. You can’t change the past, and what’s done is done.”

In other news, a woman confessed on social media that she is starting to feel anxious about the future of her marriage, as she and her husband are still living apart a year after their wedding.

She shared on the r/askSingapore forum on Saturday (April 25) that she only stays over at her husband’s place “one to two times a week.”

Read more: ‘Husband co-owns flat with mum’: Woman says living together not possible, asks for advice

This article (Man says parents take 15% of his pay, leaving him unable to save for a home) first appeared on The Independent Singapore News.